Papa!
How did the lesson with Professor Karnappe go?
It was incredible, really!
I wanna do it again!
When you don't have cash, your fate is sealed.
It sucks, but...
That's our reality.
This is an extracted peritoneal tumour from another hospital.
T/N: This develops in a thin layer of tissue that lines the abdomen, uterus, bladder, and rectum.
These ridged cells have multiplied rapidly and closely within a healthy blood vessel.
If you'll look here, you'll see a malignant extra-adrenal pheochromocytoma has also appeared.
T/N: A tumour that produces adrenaline. Honestly, I don't know whether I'm translating this well or not.
Tumours in the liver were extracted twice after this, but the findings are the same.
That's it from Pathology.
More tumours spread there than we thought.
Surgery's already looking to be hell.
Should they be moved to palliative care?
T/N: Palliative care is like comforting therapy for patients who suffer from serious illnesses.
If we gave them a choice about it, though,
it'd definitely put the patient under financial stress.
When you don't have cash,
your options in treatment are limited.
That's our reality.
Are you serious?
As the one who made the diagnosis, you obviously gotta present it.
The conference for OB/GYN surgeons is the day after tomorrow, right?
Right, I'll do my best!
I'm so excited!
Oh, don't you start!
It's kind of nerve-wracking, you know!
You're nervous?
I am! I'm ridiculously nervous!
When I was a kid and I had school plays, or piano recitals...
I could never go to sleep the night before them!
Piano?
Dr. Miyazaki, are you by any chance a pianist?
Well, sort of...
The truth is I've hit a spot of trouble trying to gather staff for a hospital concert.
We're told "Pathology has new members, but no new contributions."
That happens for stuff like this too, right, Director Sada?
Are you saying that that's my fault?
No, I never said anything like that!
But if we contribute more to the hospital,
then maybe people will see pathologists differently.
Aren't you just saying it's my fault?
I told you, I never said that in my life!
Were you lying about knowing how to?
Oh, is that it?
Now hold on! Listen here...
I did piano all the way until junior year in high school!
In fact, I didn't know whether to go to college for music or medicine.
That's amazing!
It's really cool!
It really is great, yeah!
So isn't it fine if you perform?
I'm sorry?
I'm sure a lot of patients would love to hear her, right?
She's got the skill. It's decided.
Why did you all agree without my permission?
Morii-san, what do you think I should play?
You know I don't know anything about that.
And where do you think I can practise my playing?
Don't you think she's motivated?
She took it pretty well.
How's work going?
What?
Work.
What?
So long from me to you,
I'm going to another world.
I'm slipping in, so I'll say "so long!"
What a weird song!
It probably is, huh?
Sensei made it up just now, though.
I don't think you can sing that kind of stuff to a girl, though!
You think so?
Shota!
Oh, mama!
You're so laaaaate!
Sensei!
So long from me to you!
I'll see you tomorrow, okay?
All right.
I'm sorry you couldn't give a proper goodbye.
It wouldn't be right to make the children so upset.
Because their sensei is dying of cancer.
I'm sorry.
But you understand, don't you?
Yeah.
Are you staying in late again, Dr. Miyazaki?
Oh, thanks for your help today.
It's this late already?
Yeah.
No matter how much time I have, it's never enough!
It really is hard being a doctor, huh?
I'm not whining or anything.
There's a conference in two days, too.
Just you wait: I'm filled with motivation!
Then give it all your all.
There's coffee for you, too.
Thanks a lot!
Here we go...
Um...
Excuse me.
Which entrance is open at night?
Visiting hours are over, you know.
Oh, no...
I'll be admitted here today.
Over at Oncology.
Are you Kobayakawa-san?
Yes, that's me.
I'm sorry I got here so late.
It's all right.
Where's your luggage?
This is it.
I haven't really got much essentials...
We can wait for you to come back.
No, that isn't necessary.
Sorry for the trouble.
Nah, don't worry.
See you.
I'm ready.
Here you go.
I'm Inagaki from Palliative Care.
Good to meet you!
Kobayakawa-san.
We believe that right now your cancer is spreading everywhere.
Of course, if you so wish it,
then we can operate right away.
But we're sure that another tumour will just pop up immediately after.
I understand just fine.
But how much time do I have to live?
We can only predict possibilities for that.
However...
If I had to give one...
About a year.
If you kept your physical fitness, you'd have a longer time, but there's no doubt the cancer will keep spreading.
You're real skilled, aren't you, Doctor?
The other hospital said I had half a year.
But I suppose whether I think you're a good doctor or not doesn't change much.
In that case...
It'd be good to get you treated right away, don't you think?
Yes.
Please sign this agreement first.
All right.
Now, we'll have you admitted here at Oncology.
Once your test results come out, you'll be moved to Palliative Care.
Dr. Inagaki will be your new physician, too.
Kobayakawa-san, let's do our best from now on!
Okay.
All right!
Our microscope isn't powerful enough, so take the sample to Keiro University.
Just let them know they'll give us the biopsy.
Okay. I understand.
We have to buy more...
This is Pathology.
I see.
If you'll excuse me.
Dr. Kishi, the operation the day after tomorrow was cancelled.
Kobayakawa-san in Oncology's.
Kobayakawa...
Are you Kobayakawa-san?
Dr. Kishi, could you show me Kobayakawa-san's medical records?
I'm busy right now, you know.
Shall I confiscate this?
Hey, now...
You notice something?
Not really...
It's nothing like that, but...
This is the young man you talked about at the conference yesterday, right?
Yeah.
The guy who was diagnosed with a rare cancer.
Extra-adrenal retroperitoneal paraganglioma.
T/N: Paragangliomas are rare neuroendocrine tumours. They are hormonally active and have a high incidence of malignancy.
It appeared 3 years ago.
He had three operations in another hospital.
So when they say his operation's been cancelled...
All future surgeries are cancelled, too.
The cancer spread too much.
He knows that surgery won't give him the result he wants.
He probably decided to be moved to Palliative Care on his own.
So he wants to make the most of what he has left without going under treatment, right?
That's what it looks like.
But he's so young.
He's the same age as Morii-san and I.
CVD and MIBG didn't have any effect.
But he hasn't had an Oct yet...
Oct?
Octreotide.
It's used to treat carcinoid tumours.
A so-called "anti-cancer drug".
It's a drug that stops excessive hormone production.
In effect it's supposed to shrink the tumour itself.
Octreotide is supposed to be your last choice for treatment.
The hell you sounding so doctor-y for?
Because I am a doctor!
Um, after that...
Oh, right.
Octreotides are supposedly very difficult to use.
Why's that?
Unless the tumour has this specific receptor, it won't have an effect.
The chance of success is 1 out of 6.
There's only a 1 in 6 chance it'll work?
There's one more thing, too.
You need loads of cash.
About how much?
Insurance doesn't cover it, and you need two a day with 3,000 yen per ampoule.
That's 20,000 yen a month.
240,000 yen a year...
It ain't a drug you can just try out for fun.
You can't get it without money, huh.
Ah, well...
That's usually the case.
Sorry for that.
We ran out of coffee, so I'm buying.
Thanks a lot.
Please do.
subbed by kurokouchi @ livejournal if you paid for this nakanishi will give you an endoscopy
We met yesterday.
They let you out?
Oh, yeah.
There're things they don't sell in the store here, so I'm going to the station.
See you.
Hey!
If you're going to the station, it'll be quicker this way.
Bend forward!
Was it scary?
It was fun!
I'm sorry you had to go all this way, Doctor.
Nah...
I'm no doctor.
You aren't?
I'm a lab technician.
It's called co-medical...
Something, but I don't really know.
It's not just the doctors who wear white coats, you know.
And some doctors don't wear them at all.
Is that so?
A weird doctor, yeah.
The doctor at Palliative Care is unique, too.
Really?
Well, maybe not weird, but very passionate.
He made this action pose saying we'd do our best,
and said that instead of dying with regret, I ought to do all the things I want to.
I've got just a year or so left.
It makes you wonder how much meaning you can get out of life from there.
But I've been ready to die for a while now.
"Do the things you want to do."
But I don't wanna do anything, you know?
I don't have any parents.
I don't have any hobbies.
No girlfriend, either.
Even my friends...
aren't really my friends, either.
In the end...
I haven't really got anyone by my side, do I?
I don't have any friends to help ease my mind.
I just remembered something.
Something I wanna do.
It's to go to a school for music...
And compose something of my own.
Compose something?
Yeah, but...
That kind of thing costs a lot of money.
I gave up immediately.
But to this day, I do still want to compose something of my own.
It's not final that you have just a year left.
There're still things you can do to make the tumours smaller, aren't there?
Loquat leaves? Aromatherapy?
That's not what I meant.
So...
Octreotides, you mean?
So you know about them.
The previous hospital recommended it.
It was a cruel joke, knowing how much money you need.
It's tough, man!
When you don't have any money, life makes all your decisions for you.
The ugly truth-mour.
It's a pun!
You didn't get it?
All this blabbing about myself is the ugly truth-mour.
It's kind of hard to get!
I wanted to be a doctor, you know.
I wasn't smart enough for state university.
So I got into one of those third-rate, private medical schools somehow, but...
In the summer of junior year, the family business went bad.
So in the end, I dropped out on my own.
I had six more years to graduate at 3 million yen a year.
T/N: About 26,400 USD.
You can't make that much on a part-time job.
I had a scholarship from the hospital I'm working at.
So I dropped out of med school and got the job I have now.
Instead of paying them in money,
I have to work for 6 years, instead.
I love my job, you know.
But...
In the summer of my junior year, I only had 5 million yen.
T/N: About 44,000 USD.
So I wondered where I could go and what it was I could do.
It's tough, man.
When you don't have any money, life makes all your decisions for you.
That's the ugly truth-mour.
All this blabbing about myself is the ugly truth-mour, too.
This is the frozen specimen.
And this is the glutaraldehyde under our microscope.
Thanks for all your help.
Zakki!
So you've come!
Professor Nakaguma!
I got so surprised seeing so many people in Pathology!
We've got a lot of pathologists.
And about 8 or so lab technicians.
About that, though, when you consider Morii-san doing everything alone...
He really is great lab tech, isn't he?
It's all 'cause of Kishi...
Morii-kun's only getting smarter and smarter, isn't he?
I want to become qualified soon, too.
I want Dr. Kishi and Morii-san to recognise my talents, too.
You're one serious cookie, aren't you, Zakki?
Nuh-uh.
I'll take some of these.
If you need anything at all,
you can come by here any time, okay?
You're always welcome here, Zakki.
Do you really not like my place that much?
No, that's not it...
Um...
Do you think I shouldn't be working in my department?
Director Sada said something about how it was like while I wasn't there.
Do you know anything, Professor Nakaguma?
Nothing in particular...
But Sobokai's Pathology Department has always been in a delicate situation.
So that means...
I don't really know.
I thought you of all people would...
You know, you and I rely too much on Morii-san for everything, Dr. Kishi!
The norm goes like this.
Over there at Keiro University's hospital,
they had 8 lab technicians!
Yeah, that's true.
But if Morii-kun worked under better circumstances, he wouldn't learn much.
You're saying that, but you make the most trouble, Dr. Kishi!
The work he's doing is worth scholarships.
Dr. Kishi, this isn't a joke at all, you know!
It's time for the conference! I'll go ahead, okay?
I always thought this before, but...
If you want to quit, then you can.
Why're you saying that all of a sudden, Dr. Kishi?
No reason.
Dr. Kishi?
Can I ask you something?
About what?
If you were about to die...
Would you have any regrets?
Me, dying?
Just hypothetically.
I got my hands full with work.
Ain't no time to think about that.
Don't know if you have regrets, though.
I don't have anything to regret!
Oh, really?
I said I don't.
In the summer of my junior year, I only had 5 million yen.
So I wondered where I could go and what it was I could do.
So...
Octreotides, you mean?
It's tough, man!
When you don't have any money, life makes all your decisions for you.
Don't know if you have regrets, though.
Octreotides
Good morning.
I'm so sorry!
So you're late on the day of your report.
I kept re-doing my presentation again and again!
Now I'm late!
I'm so sorry!
Good morning!
Good morning.
So sorry, really.
For troubling you in the morning.
What is it?
Uh...
There's a young man from Oncology in Palliative Care, right?
With pheochromocytoma.
Kobayakawa-san, right?
Yeah.
One of the kids in my department...
He's been worried about the guy's health.
So I'm here bothering you.
Nah, I mean, it is troublesome, but...
I don't want it to be any more so.
You don't want it to be any more, you say...
I see now.
If anything happens, give me a call.
I'll go there right away.
Roger, captain.
I'm counting on you, man.
We need him down at Pathology.
You okay?
Doesn't the poor girl look worried to you?
Sorry. I'll start the machine right away.
Huh?
Huh!?
It won't start.
Why?
What--where's Dr. Kishi?
Where did Dr. Kishi go?
Oh, it's all right!
It just needed some time.
Oh, thank you.
You're really nervous, aren't you?
Of course I am!
Sugiyama-san.
She's 46 years old, and this is the endometriosis biopsy.
Um...
There's a lot of peripheral blood.
We extracted a lot of this, but can't really say...
I mean, the glands seem to be clustered quite a bit over here.
And this area...
Not that one...
This one!
This is the part I meant.
Did you find anything you want to do?
No.
Don't tell me...
You're thinking there's no point to doing anything, are you?
Palliative Care isn't the place to embrace death.
The world misunderstands that.
I'm sure you think that way, too, but you're wrong.
You don't know how much time you have left.
But I really don't have anything I want to do.
Let's give octreotides a shot.
Didn't we talk about this already?
Trying just one ampoule is fine.
It's only 3,000 yen. I can pay for that!
Hey, you!
If you don't have an N2A somatostatin receptor, it won't work.
We'll examine your tumours, and if it shows up that it's an N2A-type, please re-think--
Don't give the patient weird hopes!
Do you have any idea how cruel you're being?
You might not have cash...
But dirty money or anything else is fine.
Hey!
We believe it's a complex endometrial atypical hyperplasia, however...
The issue is distinguishing it from a G1 endometrioid adenocarcinoma.
The issue is...
Where was that?
Oh, no--!
If there's cancer, a hysterectomy is fine.
What makes you think so?
I mean...
We're not 100% sure of this diagnosis yet.
Could we possibly re-examine the area and take a better look at it?
The patient's life is in our hands.
Please!
I don't want you to fight!
It's fine, I'll beat him.
Dr. Kishi!
This kid said using dirty money is fine if you don't have any!
This is something that'll change the rest of his life.
This is a matter of life and death!
Do you think not having money means he doesn't get a choice!?
Do you know cruel it is, giving hope to someone with a drug that might not even work on them?
Isn't leaving dying as the only option even more cruel than that?
Finding something meaningful with the time he has left...
Isn't that just telling him to give up and wait to die!?
It is.
He doesn't have to give up yet.
You haven't given it all up yet, have you?
You don't understand anything.
He told me himself.
He didn't try octreotides because of the money.
I'm probably the only one he said that to.
That's why it has to be me.
I won't let this man die with any regrets!
He made a huge mess.
My bad.
I'll be sure to scold him properly later.
Give him a break.
All right.
Think about it.
Look into my eyes.
If all you think about is dying, then dying is all you have.
It's absolute shit, ain't it?
It sure is.
I still have a long way to go, don't I?
I still...
I still have a "still".
Yeah.
You're still alive.
What the...
Why is it like this?
Why's it too late...
You haven't undergone treatment yet.
Palliative Care Admittance Agreement
You're okay with that?
No.
I don't like it.
Do you want to give the octreotides a try?
I don't know.
Someone like me...
I don't wanna die.
I suddenly started thinking that.
I don't have anything.
I can't do anything.
And earlier, the idea of living...
Didn't sound good at all.
But...
This...
Please disregard it.
What path he chooses is his choice.
He'll decide it for himself.
Don't influence him.
Whatever he decides,
the doctors just have to give their all to help.
Not just so he can die in comfort without pain.
But so he can really, truly live.
That's what Palliative Care does.
I know that.
That's why...
I didn't want him to have any regrets.
It wasn't for yourself?
Ah, well.
So?
Did you figure your own problems out?
Hey, Morii-kun.
Being an adult...
You have to accept that making compromises day after day is normal.
You can't help the way you feel.
And, well...
It's too much sometimes.
But even then, even a little bit, you can do something about it.
Dr. Kishi?
This isn't like you.
For as long as you're with me,
my words are absolute.
Hurry and get back to work.
Working is impossible without your coffee, man.
That was...
He did it on purpose, didn't he?
He knew that I needed his help, didn't he?
But you did just fine on your own!
Can you really say I did "just fine"?
Do you need anything?
Is Morii-san in here?
Yes.
I asked Dr. Inagaki to give me a bit more time to think.
About trying octreotides, I mean.
In the meantime, I'd like to find out what kind of receptors I have.
The test for that is done here, right?
Yep.
The results'll help me figure out if I should try it or not.
But I shouldn't take advice from anyone.
That's what Dr. Inagaki told me.
That being said...
I wrote a song.
It's for a competition with awards and all.
The best work will join the repertoire of the All-Japan Piano Competition.
All these people I don't know...
They'll be able to play and listen to my music!
Isn't that amazing?
Sure is.
Morii-san?
Thank you for everything.
Nah...
Morii-san!
Hey there.
I finished my song!
You wrote another?
I just got ridiculously inspired!
You're a strong person, Kobayakawa-san.
It's not strength at all.
I just kept thinking I didn't want to die.
It felt like continuing to do something was the answer to how to live life to the fullest.
After that...
For the first time I thought, "I don't like this."
I don't have it, do I?
The receptor.
But that's all right.
From now on, I'll think of what I want for myself.
I'm sorry.
No, I don't wanna hear that...
An apology sounds awful, doesn't it?
You think so?
I sure do.
I had a lot of fun riding that bike with you.
And sharing our secrets with each other was...
I'd never done something embarrassing like that before.
I didn't want to have cancer, but...
I found something good because of it.
I'm grateful for everything.
Can we still talk every once in a while?
Yeah.
Always.
See you.
'till next time.
'till then.
From now on, won't you try becoming a doctor?
I mean, you'll have to quit your current job, but...
Don't you think this is the best time to do it?
What I achieved...
So long from me to you,
I'm going to another world.
I'm slipping in, so I'll say "so long!"
So long from me to you...
Sensei!
Farty-sensei!
Hey, sensei!
Look here--!
Shota!
Oh, I'm sorry!
Are you all right?
I'm fine.
Yes, this is Pathology.
Yes.
I understand.
Morii-san, Kobayakawa-san is...
Sprint
What I achieved.
Number one:
I got to write
at least one song.
Number two:
I was alone, but
I made a friend.
Number three:
You managed to save...
someone's life.
花びらが 風に吹かれ
Hanabira ga kaze ni fukare
Petals are floating in the wind
命のように散っていく
Inochi no you ni chitteiku
Scattered like many little lives
ただ追いかけて 悲しみもなく
Tada oikakete kanashimi mo naku
Go ahead and chase them let the sadness melt away
途方に暮れるんだろう
Tohou ni kurerundarou
Isn't this how we reach the end of the road?
Morii-kun!
Have you gram-stained the necrotising fasciitis sample yet?
I put it on your desk, Doctor.
涙拭かないと ほら
Namida fukanai to hora
Even if you don't wipe your tears away, look
Oh. Yeah, it's here...
Morii-san?
Yes?
About the patient who might have pylori gastritis...
桜が綺麗だよ
Sakura ga kirei dayo
The cherry blossoms are beautiful
I've done some Giemsa staining.
Thank you so much!
Morii-kun, some coffee, please!
Yeah, yeah...
Hey, Dr. Miyazaki!
We're counting on you for the concert today.
壊れそうなほど
Kowaresouna hodo
These fragile limits
Right!
I'm kind of getting nervous now!
What'll happen if you get too nervous?
胸が苦しくて
Mune ga kurushikute
Might twist your chest in pain
You have a point there.
I'll get to work.
After that, Morii-san, the Grocott staining for the oesophageal biopsy...
明日が見えなくても
Ashita ga mienakute mo
You might not see a hope for tomorrow
You got it.
Well, when it comes to hospital concerts you're bound to get nervous.
Relax, relax!
Of course!
Delicious.
ただ歌うしかなくて
Tada utau shikanakute
But for now, just keep singing
You're fancy for a youngster, aren't you?
Oh, do you think so? Oh, you're so right...
Aaaaall right...
Sprint
確かに生きていく
Tashikani ikiteiku
No matter what, keep on living
あの桜みたいに力強く
Ano sakura mitai ni chikara tsuyoku
Become stronger just like those cherry blossoms
言葉じゃないものが
Kotoba janai mono ga
It isn't something you can explain with words
Thank you.
心に咲き誇れ
Kokoro ni saki hokore
Let your heart bloom proudly
あの桜みたいに
Ano sakura mitai ni
Just like those cherry blossoms